When New Daddy Schooled Winnie

New Daddy is a cat person. He has raised cats since he was a small boy. He never had a dog and, frankly, he never wanted a dog. 

He likes to quote the movie, Meet the Parents, regarding cats vs. dogs: "Why would I want an emotionally inferior animal?"

New Daddy doesn't understand dogs: Why are they so helpless? Why are they so dirty? Why do they think they're going to die if you leave the house for an hour?  

Ian and Winnie share a tumultuous relationship. I jokingly say, “Winnie and Ian have a love-hate relationship. Winnie loves Ian and Ian hates Winnie.” 

The first part of that statement is very, very true. Winnie adores Ian. 

She yips in excitement when we drive up to his house and she cries miserably when he leaves my apartment. She nestles into him when they nap together, wedging herself into his back or legs.  

Ian finds Winnie’s unabashed adoration and spirited nature, err, difficult. Winnie may look frou frou, but she is all dog: energetic, playful, vigorous, and affectionate. 

She thrives on attention. When she exercises, she’s a good dog. When she lacks exercise, she morphs into a Very Bad Dog Indeed. 

When I started dating Ian, Winnie was at the height of that most terrible hyperactive puppy stage. Winnie was a hellion. No amount of exercise calmed her. She bit while playing. She barked at everything. 

And that’s when New Daddy stepped in and schooled her ass. 

I had read about putting puppies in time-out to deter biting, and I had tried it, you know, a little. If I remembered. 

At New Daddy’s urging, I began consistently placing her in time-out for misdeeds. Winnie can’t stand being alone. The punishments worked.  

Winnie behaves much better these days, due to both discipline and natural maturation. Still, she’s a puppy with boundless energy and a mischievous nature. 

And she’s a dog, not a cat. “Clearly of inferior intelligence,” New Daddy would say.  

Laura: “Ian, do you love Winnie?” 

Ian: ".................” 

Laura: “I’ll take your stony silence as a yes.”  

Ian: “I love Winnie but she annoys me. I’m a cat person.”  

New Daddy continues to try to school Winnie’s ass, hoping she’ll adopt a more cat-like disposition. And I sit back and watch, amused.  

Winnie hears a noise, Winnie barks, New Daddy yells, Winnie barks, New Daddy yells, Winnie barks, New Daddy yells, Mommy laughs. It’s the Circle of Life indeed.