Recycled Stuff: Winiferd in the Burbs Goes Green

Ian and I are still working on the home renovation. In the mean time, I've been scrambling to think of something interesting to write about until I can post about the home makeover.

At which point, we can all move forward with our lives. Which is great, BECAUSE I'M REAL TIRED OF PAINTING.

Anyways, I hit upon the bright idea of using this post as a dumping ground for failed ideas, or material that didn't quite make the cut.

Congratulations. You're currently residing in the bowels of Winiferd in the Burbs.

1. When I wrote the post, Laura's Seven Beauty Tips, I asked Ian to create pictures of me wearing ridiculous make-up. In particular, I needed a picture of me with raccoon eyes caused by too much eye makeup.

He whipped up this charming portrait:

Laura: "I dunno. I look like Marilyn Manson in a red wig. I don't want to frighten readers. Can you use a picture where I'm smiling?"

Ian: "That picture took me forever! Well, maybe five minutes... I'm just going to Photoshop your smile into the picture."

Laura: "Why's my smile so tiny?"

Ian: "I had to shrink it down to fit your mouth."

Laura: "You took a mega creepy picture and turned into something twenty times more disturbing. I like it."

Alas, the pictures didn't quite capture heavy eye makeup the way I wanted, so I grabbed a generic internet photo instead.

2. I had this idea, at one point, to feature regularly occurring columns all the time. The only one that ever stuck was Monday Night Musings. The following are column ideas that died a painful death:

The Winiferd in Burb's Hottie of the Week:
Basically, Ian would have won every week. Harvey would have won occasionally, as well.

Ian Chooses Laura's Clothes:
I had this brilliant idea that Ian would pick out my clothes everyday, and we would document his choices. HILARIOUS!

Except, I have very few clothes and all my clothes sorta look the same and the whole bit would have gotten tired after two days. WHAT'S THAT? LAURA WEARING BLACK PANTS AGAIN? YOU DON'T SAY!

The "Save New Mommy From Corporate Hell" Campaign:
I thought it would be funny to set up a campaign encouraging readers to send monetary donations, so I could leave the corporate world and blog full-time. I wanted to showcase a running tally of donations.

Monday: $0.00
Tuesday: $0.00
Wednesday: $0.00
Thursday: $0.00
Friday: $0.00
Saturday: $0.00
Sunday: $0.00

Gets pretty tedious, doesn't it?

3. When I wrote about Redbox vs Netflix, Ian drew this fantastic picture of Redbox attacking us.

I asked Ian to draw a comparative picture of us in love with Netflix. I envisioned the two of us holding a red Netflix envelope with giant smiles and hearts everywhere. Instead, he drew this:

Laura: "Uh, what is it?"

Ian: "You don't know? You can't tell?"

Laura: "Uh... maybe."

Ian: "It's the future. It's the future of how we will interface with the internet. Don't you see it?"

Laura: "Uh... maybe."